Thursday, April 5, 2007

The Saga of Sanjaya

Sanjaya, Sanjaya, Sanjaya! Oh, how I love you so. Ha!

If you have no idea who Sanjaya is, you must be living under a rock. Sanjaya Malakar is the 17-year-old talentless sensation who keeps going strong this season of American Idol. His hair is full of body and volume. His voice is anything but.

Sanjaya is the funniest thing to hit TV since The Office. Seriously.

She bangs!  She bangs!I haven't watched American Idol since the days of William Hung. [She bangs! She bangs!]

Well, that's not entirely true. I usually tune in at the beginning. I like the first few weeks when everybody sucks. It's pretty much the same reason I watch figure skating -- to see people fall on their asses. Sadistic, I know.

But I kept watching this season for Sanjaya, Sanjaya, Sanjaya. I can't stop watching. Every week I turn on Fox to watch the trainwreck and to see him survive again and again, while better singers get the boot. He's like the American Idol cockroach.

Ponyhawk!And, of course, there's the hair. Oh, the hair! Homeboy's got more luscious locks than I could ever dream of! Sleek, teased, or in a ponyhawk (that's seven ponytails up the middle of the head in quasi-mohawk fashion), Sanjaya's hair never fails to please. And by "please," I mean "make me snort with delight."

Sanjaya has singlehandedly revived my interest in American dol. Howard Stern has encouraged his listeners to vote for Sanjaya, as has Vote for the Worst, a website that states, "We agree that a fish out of water is entertaining, and we want to acknowledge this fact by encouraging people help the amusing
antagonists stick around." Love it.

Me so hungry.The best part of the Saga of Sanjaya, though, has to be the freaky MySpace peeps. This wacko and others went on a hunger strike until Sanjaya got canned. A hunger strike! For American Idol! Unreal.

The girl I linked above recently ended her 16-day hunger strike, citing "medical reasons." Uh huh. Sure. Heffa just got hungry. Admit it.

Can't wait until next week. How much longer can he go?

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